Once and now.

I once knew Joy. She was amazing and filled up most of my life.
But then she got a boyfriend. the rest is well-known history and a bunch load of lame, stupid clichés...

I can't cry over her anymore, cause I'm all dried-out.
I can't tell her things anymore, cause she doesn't want to know me.
I can't see her anymore, cause she doesn't want to know of me.

We dreamed together. Now, dreaming of her only brings bitterness.
We laughed together. Now, laughing is still not the same.
We cried together. Now, I won't cry anymore!

My dream is to get a boat and sail all over the world. and to become a tattoo-artist and live of my artwork. I also wanna go and help people as a nurse.
And as always, I wanna see as much of the world as possible!

I don't really care what sacrifices I make, cause I know it'll be worth it in the end!

Bill, I owe you so much! <3

And I hope Joy is happy, even though I'm no longer part of it, and that this fact will always burn in my chest.
thanks for the past 15 years together. I couldn't have made it whithout you!

Now, I will try to only look forwards! :3

how to make money?.. and time...

There is this folk school on Zanzibar I really really want to go to...
It's 4 months long, and has all the great classes! and you get to go on a safari for two weeks, sleep with the native villages AND you get a diving certificate! *LOVE*

but... how am I going to make 60.000 kr.??
And I still want to:

• go to Australia for a year
• go roadtripping in the USA for 3 months with Anja
• go back to Palestine with W this summer
• open up a bookcafe in dk
• go to London with my sister
• move to Berlin with Anja 
• go to Obscene Extreme in the Czech Republic this summer
• go on interrail
• become a tattoo artist
• get a houseboat

Ah, gee... and with all that, I also need to find 4 years to go to nurse school...
I know... Luxcurious problem... At least the school is free in dk...

oh, why did I have to think about that stupid folk school again? I was planning on going after college, but then reality hit me, and I was no way near having the money for it... and then I met W... and forgot about it/gave up... but now I really wanna go again... geez.. It's to early for me, to feel that my life is too short.. I'm still only 21 gawdammit!

But even if I was able to get the money for all of this, how am I supposed to find the time for it?
well, at least I have until May here in Norway to think about it... *sob*